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View Full Version : Can I ever escape the "death zone" ?



reclaiming_life
January 22nd, 2011, 07:04 PM
Hey. I first tested HIV+ over 5 years ago. Back then, I was burned out and prematurely aged (I was 20 but looked 30 or older). Then, I got better without taking anti-retrovirals or anything else. I now look about my age, maybe a little younger.

My question is: have you ever found yourself acting as if you need to do something, even though you know/think you know that you'll be OK?

I take lots of supplements, some of which are popular with HIV+ people. Antioxidants in particular are my favorites. I eat too much, in part because I have this weird fear that my "diseased" body isn't getting enough nutrition. Its as if I'm fattening myself up to prove to myself that I'm "really OK," after all.

Now I'm healthy looking and overweight. Does anyone out there know what I mean? Its as if the "death zone" has been reached into my mind and I don't know how to stop these behaviors and truly believe that I'm going to be OK.

Gos
January 22nd, 2011, 07:09 PM
I can relate, though I'm not so sure that HIV status has anything to do with it in my case.

I've had Crohn's disease all my life and as a result I've been underweight for most of my life. I was always told that I needed to try to gain as much weight as possible.

More recently, I've gotten a bit better control over my Crohn's, and as a result I've become a bit overweight, but I can't seem to shake the conditioning from earlier that I need to keep eating to have as much body fat as possible in the event of another bout of Crohn's.


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unsure
January 23rd, 2011, 01:38 AM
Yes!
I have put on 3 stone since diagnosis and although i am unsure about this whole HIV question, part of me wants to get as much nutrition in my body as i can:confused:

I worry about the death zone too:(


If only i could pick a side and stick to it, but i cant.

I dont fully belive the orthodox side, but i am not sure about the dissident side either(Something must be going on for some of us to be comming down with the same types of illness)

On top of this the side of me that believes in conspiracy thinks this could be a man-made virus:eek:

You can see how f***ed up my mind is about this whole buisiness:(

moonchild493
January 23rd, 2011, 02:52 AM
Doesn't it just suck to have AIDS and be fat? I mean, one of the perks, if you're prone to overweight, should be to finally be thin. When I was sick several years ago, I lost about 70 pounds. Even then, I wasn't really underweight for my height, but I lost a bunch of muscle and looked pretty haggard. Once I started feeling better, I just couldn't stop eating. I think there's something to be said for that setpoint theory...I'm right back where I started. And I never seemed to regain the strength in my thighs, which have always been large. I think they are now about 90% fat. Somewhere deep inside is the feeling that I will get sick again and lose a whole bunch of weight, so I need to store it up.

Linda

Brian Carter
January 23rd, 2011, 03:58 AM
....but I am not sure about the dissident side either(

It's called the greatest mind fuck in history, but here's a solution.

If one for whatever reason finds oneself in this predicament, please make an effort, a consorted effort for daily reading everything there is to know and read in dissent of HIV and AIDS. Early literature is of utmost importance.

If anyone doesn't know where to find such, all one has to do but ask.

Unsure,
Have you ever heard of Hank Barnes (http://barnesworld.blogs.com/)?

unsure
January 25th, 2011, 12:17 AM
It's called the greatest mind fuck in history, but here's a solution.

If one for whatever reason finds oneself in this predicament, please make an effort, a consorted effort for daily reading everything there is to know and read in dissent of HIV and AIDS. Early literature is of utmost importance.

If anyone doesn't know where to find such, all one has to do but ask.

Unsure,
Have you ever heard of Hank Barnes (http://barnesworld.blogs.com/)?

You guys on here always give hope
Thank you
x

StarZ
January 25th, 2011, 12:21 AM
Hamer says obesity and anxiety are linked deep in the psych, storing food for the anticipated setback. You gain weight nomatter what you eat in this instance. Would make sense.

I dont think the AIDS zone ever goes away but the death zone does. You not gonna die but I think we have more anxiety with small health changes other groups can ignore completely.

My favourite statement: Hospitals are FULL of HIV negative people!